Friday, May 9, 2014

Day 100, Day 1

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Dear Ellie,

Yesterday was your 100th day in the NICU... but also your 1st day home.  When you were born 4 months early and I researched all of the scary things that would likely befall you, I thought your homecoming would be a lot different.  Even just a month and a half ago, I thought you'd come home on oxygen and a pulse ox.  I thought you'd struggle with eating and forget to breath.  I thought we'd dangle over you late into the night, checking every 30 seconds to make sure your lips weren't blue.  None of this happened.  Instead, your homecoming unfolded strangely similar to the way I thought it would had you been born full term.  Lot's of full throated crying and sleep deprivation and pride, but very little fear.

You've seen more than 3 months of life already.  You've braved ET tubes and blood transfusions and infections and feeding tubes and chronic lung disease and suffocation and you've brushed with a thousand different species of frailty.  You've endured more pain and hardship than most people would experience in their entire lives.  But the most incredible thing of all?  It all happened before your life was ever supposed to begin.

Your due date is still two weeks away, but I feel as though the lives of all three of us have finally begun.

8 comments:

  1. I am sooo incredibly happy for the three of you! It is time for me to come out of the woods. I am a lurker on BBC and clicked the link to your blog a few weeks ago. Although my daughter was born at 36 weeks, I still read a lot about preemies development. I absolutely love your letters to your lovely daughter, Ellie.
    Baby Ellie: You are amazing!
    Lots of love from our family to yours.
    -- Cathy

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  2. Glad to see her home. It sounds like its been a long, long road - but well worth it.

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  3. We are over the top excited to see you in a home setting......smiling with your amazing bundle of love. She is a gift, we believe there are no mistakes, she is certainly destined for great things. Our love to ALL of you!

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  4. Yay! We are all so excited for you guys! SO thrilled that you are finally home. We'll give you a while to adjust, then we'll be knocking at your door. Ready for a turn to hold that little bundle of precious joy...when you are ready to share, and Ellie is ready for company.
    ~Debby

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  5. Thanks everyone! It's been a fun and uneventful two days so far. When Ellie is settled in, I'm sure she'd love to have some visitors! :-)

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  6. Yay! So glad you are home with Ellie, and even.more so, that it is so different from what you imagined when she was born. Looking forward to reading about all the adventures she will get to have!

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  7. Happy Mother's Day, Rani! Dana, your turn comes next month. You have probably already discovered that you "no longer matter" it's all about Ellie! Hugs to you all.
    ~Debby

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  8. I am so happy for this milestone! Ellie has done so well. I love the smile on Rani's face. Keep up the great parenting and the patience. More milestones will come on Ellie's time. :)

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